im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize