The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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