i permit you to call me
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
