garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
