just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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