I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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