bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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