ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
