Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
