i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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