Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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