she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
