Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
