I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Randomize
