Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize