Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
