your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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