I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
3 2 1 whiskey
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
