...so i touched it.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am one with the molecules
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize