I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Randomize