I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
