I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
