You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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