Can Purell be used as lube?
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize