I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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