Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
