Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
