i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
