JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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