just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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