nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
