why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
