he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Randomize
