I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
