Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
