Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
the day after is always just damage control
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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