would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
