i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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