So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
