Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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