This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.