you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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