i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Never let your siblings swipe right.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
