he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Boobs are out for the taking
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
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