im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
