remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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