But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Randomize
