she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
