Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you

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(267): census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you http://tfl.nu/5ryg

Replies (23) Good night (1030) Bad night (2141)
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(914): View more from New York

Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!

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(914): Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?! http://tfl.nu/ay46

Replies (20) Good night (2476) Bad night (996)
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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired

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(902): I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired http://tfl.nu/suui

Replies (19) Good night (3477) Bad night (1091)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.

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(615): I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women. http://tfl.nu/xpcj

Replies (8) Good night (3301) Bad night (1111)
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(850): View more from Florida

You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.

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(850): You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line. http://tfl.nu/m4ec

Replies (16) Good night (1342) Bad night (4676)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.

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(201): Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday. http://tfl.nu/gpxr

Replies (5) Good night (3110) Bad night (1022)
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(606): View more from Kentucky

I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face

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(606): I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face http://tfl.nu/ob2s

Replies (5) Good night (1305) Bad night (2333)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !

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(402): Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special ! http://tfl.nu/2zxz

Replies (23) Good night (1796) Bad night (1053)
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(707): View more from California

Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick

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(707): Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick http://tfl.nu/qfj7

Replies (3) Good night (1705) Bad night (663)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.

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(402): On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever. http://tfl.nu/nvjj

Replies (22) Good night (3871) Bad night (1198)
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(209): View more from California

Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....

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(209): Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage.... http://tfl.nu/5in8

Replies (2) Good night (884) Bad night (487)
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(607): View more from New York

Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!

(315): View more from New York

I get naked cuz your not there

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(607): Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?! (315): I get naked cuz your not there http://tfl.nu/p9qb

Replies (12) Good night (2949) Bad night (816)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?

(1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.

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(570): At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement? (1-570): I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet. http://tfl.nu/p7w6

Replies (2) Good night (1059) Bad night (453)
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(650): View more from California

she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"

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(650): she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?" http://tfl.nu/za23

Replies (2) Good night (558) Bad night (320)
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(323): View more from California

My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.

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(323): My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job. http://tfl.nu/hsg6

Replies (0) Good night (666) Bad night (252)

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