Texts From Last Night

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  (312): View more from Illinois

  the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.

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  (312): the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building. http://tfl.nu/d9kx
  Replies (29) Good night (4416) Bad night (1563)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick

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  (617): shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick http://tfl.nu/i68n
  Replies (73) Good night (18926) Bad night (3870)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.

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  (651): Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real. http://tfl.nu/xrrz
  Replies (12) Good night (932) Bad night (4272)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.

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  (315): They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it. http://tfl.nu/5i1a
  Replies (12) Good night (8386) Bad night (1193)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.

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  (304): I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn. http://tfl.nu/xmj5
  Replies (10) Good night (6324) Bad night (1395)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can

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  (408): we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can http://tfl.nu/prvy
  Replies (6) Good night (931) Bad night (5113)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.

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  (405): You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up. http://tfl.nu/06n7
  Replies (8) Good night (3605) Bad night (1089)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.

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  (502): I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all. http://tfl.nu/o1tr
  Replies (4) Good night (2505) Bad night (837)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.

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  (401): Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one. http://tfl.nu/yysi
  Replies (4) Good night (4226) Bad night (675)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.

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  (732): He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper. http://tfl.nu/grbq
  Replies (8) Good night (4391) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?

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  (214): Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember? http://tfl.nu/njcl
  Replies (2) Good night (624) Bad night (935)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.

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  (770): I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out. http://tfl.nu/df2n
  Replies (5) Good night (714) Bad night (777)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle

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  (727): Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle http://tfl.nu/kzpk
  Replies (7) Good night (475) Bad night (393)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?

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  (508): How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster? http://tfl.nu/rbos
  Replies (1) Good night (310) Bad night (744)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."

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  (401): Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel." http://tfl.nu/en31
  Replies (0) Good night (617) Bad night (160)

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