This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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