ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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